I feel like I have been absent for a time but with good reason. To be able to get away for this break required my attention to get normal life completed.
We got to Spain after a very long day/night staying awake travelling, but as soon as we got here it was like a switch flicked. It was like an instant pause from everything started, an instant sundown, a massive sigh of relief we could just take this time out, to the point I cried as I was just so so grateful to have this time.
I need this physical wind down to prepare me for what’s coming not just for my op but to carry my husband through his too it’s the mental load of everything that’s quite overwhelming.
It’s been quite a tough journey this last week reducing the tablets again the sweats and sleepless nights have been horrendous and it’s tough trying to survive on sleep deprivation that triggers all sorts of uncontrollable emotions in itself. The strangest thing is my anxiety symptoms have been so so minimal and I am so eternally grateful for this as that was my biggest worry. I think being in the sun and hitting that off switch has been my greatest asset right now.
My biggest concern is my husband singing the same bloody song since 8am this morning and it’s now 4pm and he still isn’t bored with it and my ears definitely are 😂
Next will be the best hiding place to find to try and jump out on me which he fails at miserably as his fluorescent shorts are like a beacon of light. I will create him his own where’s wally book at some point with all these crazy places he finds that really are quite terrible, apart from the one when he sat in a window arch pretending to be a Buddha which I have to say he carried off well.
My love and thoughts go to Amelia tomorrow for her op and the start of her new journey and I will be on those beautifully crafted Mala beads chanting for you tomorrow my darling 📿
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